Wednesday, June 15, 2005

You Probably Did Not Hear it Here, First

Billy Corgan interview

BC: How old are you?

Pitchfork: I'm 29.

BC: Oh, that's the tough one. Twenty-eight to 31 is the tough period.

Pitchfork: Really? Great.

BC: You have to be really careful because it's so cataclysmic, so life-altering. People do really dramatic things like get married, or they'll get divorced. Your chances of committing suicide go way up. It's basically psychic death. You see the signs of it around 27, and you're still on the out-end of it around 31. Everyone I've talked to who's gone through that and come out the other side walks out of it like, "MY LIFE IS GREAT."


Shit, dude. I am bummed. I am in the smack middle of the worst part of my life? Things seem to be going relatively well for me, all things considered- especially since the last time you and I had a tete-a-tete, William.

Julianne Shepherd blogs 'bout Baldy elsewhere, also: "my high school world was partly defined by his music. Siamese Dream was totally the soundtrack of J.B., the pro BMX biker of the summer of '93."

Oh Shep; me too. Except not being nearly as MTV-MADE cool as you, my memories are a tad different. Scooby-Doo Flashback montage! Recognize:

- - -

Yearbook committee room. I am clad in cutoffs and a Gap pullover anorak and jewelry made of hemp woven with big glass beads. Also, Birkenstock-knock-offs. Also, my hair is a bun, with chopsticks to hold it in place? Like a librarian or something? A cultured, Pier I-shoppin', tabbouleh-eating librarian? (I went through a phase in my teens that inexplicably mixed dating troubled jocks, modeling my tastes after characters in "Singles," and bedecking myself in an early-90s-World Music wardrobe. I don't know, you tell me.) Anyways, I'm doing a paste-up for the varsity softball team layout by hand (soooo pre-Pagemaker.) I have Tears for Fears concert tickets for the following Tuesday, and my boyfriend and I get in a fight about how early my curfew is that night, and that's stupid, and I also it tread into jealousy-territory by bringing up how Travis Schetzler gave me his phone number so I could discuss yearbook meeting times with him? And what the hell was that all about, because he's a POSER?

- - -

The point of the above flashback is two-fold, Billy:

1. I'm pretty sure "Disarm" was playing in the background on the yearbook room tape deck.

2. That wasn't the worst part of my life as a functioning human being, and now is? Well, holy balls.

9 comments:

the Nabob said...
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the Nabob said...

I can see BC's point. I peaked at 17 but now I'm looking for that second wind at 32. I'm going start dating a college girl with the modern-Tear for Fears-equivalent T-shirt. What are the kids listening to now? The Lightning Seeds? Del Amitri?

The Governess said...

you're just saying that because you found my copy of "cloudcukooland" in the basement.

the Nabob said...

Actually, I found it in the trunk of your car. While I was attempting to change your flat tire. Which I couldn't because you don't own a jack.

The Governess said...

oh yeah. that.

I need a babysitter.

Anonymous said...

Well, at least Corgan's doomsaying is couched in some really ridiculous astrological bullshit.

Ethan Wiggum said...

ah, had i been born 6 years earlier and female: that would have been me. as it was, i was the troubled athlete with a predilection for flannel and layers (think Piven in PCU) who moonlighted as the newspaper editor and made his long-term girlfriend miserable by flirting with her french partner.

The Governess said...

Okay, Former Gutter, just tell me you didn't wear the teeshirt of a band when you went to their concerts. Tell me you weren't that guy.

Brett, bring yr blog back already!

Ethan Wiggum said...

I wasn't that guy. And no, I'm scared shitless.