I used to like the fake, two-columned porch that protected our front door. It meant we didn't have to shovel our stoop after a snow. But last night, that POS, metal-plated worthless decorative crap resulted in zero hours of sleep. Every ice pellet ricocheted of that thing onto our bedroom window and that noise fragmented some very important pre-Valentine’s Day sleep. It sounded like a thousand grandmothers opening a thousand cellophane wrapped hard candies* in a thousand church pews. It was teh awful.
The G and I fought over that third pillow all night – the one that’s perfect for covering the other ear. Even the dog tried to steal it.
*Most likely offender: Brach’s Ice Blue Mint.