S: so bai ling is a caricature of a real person right?
The G: is the worst actress ever?
S: she was awful
The G: and that episode last night made me want to slit my throat? NOTHING was REVEALED I HATE THEM
S: I think lost needs to stop going to commercial with that BOOM and blackness routine because they are no longer applicable. I used to yell when they would do that. noooo don't go to commercial now
The G: as the N said last night: "oh, great, now they have to fake suspense."
S: and now I"m like hahahahahahah you can't pretend suspense when there is none to begin with
The G: i found myself like, cutting my toenails. in the bathroom. not during commercial. just whenever assy Bai Ling and her Magikal tattoos were on
S: B and I worked on a crossword puzzle
The G: booooooooo
S: I have a gift
The G: a gift of STDs
S: I'm a tattoo artist who also does horoscopes. GIFT. THAT IS YOUR DRAMA? SERIOUSLY
The G: My gift is: I used to work at Miami Ink on TLC. Also: the best they could get was bai ling? seriously? what, no sandra oh? no lucy lu? no members of the joy luck club? nice going, lindelof or whoever.
S: my gift to you, Lost? you better be glad I don't have cable or tivo in my room because I'd be all over the food network while you were on
The G: it was Fruit Carving Challenge last night, and the Asian girl who was on it was a chef, and WAS STILL A BETTER CHOICE THAN BAI LING w/r/t acting.
The G: she cried. real tears, my friend. her fruit sculpture fell down. i saw no tears from BL . only tears from me as i cried AT her.
S: and I cried because of jack's 1980's sunglasses and bai ling's leopard print crimped hair extension?
The G: i cried at that one dress she was wearing. my eyes caught STDs through the screen. i was like "don't fall down. please lord. for all that is good an holy. manipulate gravity. dont let that tiny tiny dress fall" the N said- "Eww. She is shaped like.... a bag of antlers."
S: are we talking about the red dress?
The G: YEEESSSSS. ARRRGGGHHH
S: because that made me cringe
The G: i know
the stds from her
radiating from that dress
S: were you willing her to stand perfectly still so nothing would flash or pop out
The G: yes
yes yes yes yes
dont walk down that alley
not cause its scary
but because i dont want you to walk