Friday, March 10, 2006

let the poison spill from your throat

When I was 5 or 6, my mother worked evening hours at a pediatric ear, nose and throat doctor. Because of this part-time job, we got exams w/no insurance copay from the doctor, a gentlemen who was a dead ringer for Doc Brown.

No copay is key, because my parents were flat broke.

I had a thing with ear infections, and I'm pretty down with the strep, too. My brother, however, is truly the strep throat king. We should have had our tonsils out years ago, but my parents were poor hippies who dug free medical care and the lifetime supply of stolen Dimetapp.

I am old, and I get strep ALL THE FREAKING TIME. I cannot explain it. The Nabob, who is never ill ever ever ever, has no concept of feverish twirling and throat glands the size of tangerines.

I once got strep throat in the middle of the Idaho desert, when I had no insurance. I paid off collections claims from the rural hospital for at least a year. I had strep when my best friend had her second child, and so I waved through her hospital room window like a leper. I had strep throat at the 4th grade spelling bee (and still came in SECOND, bitches.)

Anyways, I have strep. AGAIN. With the floor, the car, and the throat; that should sum up my "bads-come-in-threes" for the week, so I'm actually feeling much better. Three day weekend!


velveteen rabbit said...

At least your strep throat doesn't morph into scarlet fever. be thankful. although the thought of calling in sick on a friday when its 70 degrees outside with the excuse that you have scarlet fever is funny.

Get well soon G.

the Nabob said...

If you get scarlet fever, I'll be so pissed. I'm not leading you around after it's left you blind, a la Laura Ingals Wilder. You can collect your own damn acorns for dinner.

Michael said...

Eat a yogurt and drink green tea every day. Not at the same time. I swear this helps, though I still get strep a few times a year. Someday I'll not only have insurance, but even have insurance that *pays for tonsillectomies!*