Michael Shirtoff

I assumed this was a senior picture one of the G's friends had taken. One that has only just now found its way to my inbox. But Newsweek suggests otherwise.

The online article doesn't include the picture that's in Newsweek's print edition. Via my bad digital camera...



The town where above pictured Austin is from, Spencer, Iowa, is the same that produced my father. And it's where half my family still lives. Growing up, pictures like these littered our refrigerator and family photo albums as various cousins and uncles graduated high school. As far as my 10-year-old self knew, it was how things were done. Naturally, a freckled second-cousin Andy should be posed on his red Trans Am. I also assumed that as I passed from elementary school to middle school, I too would be furnished with a wide range of possible backgrounds for my class picture. Alas, it never advanced beyond standard blue. (Although, I do remember a couple kids had parents who sprang for the laser.) These Midwest pleasures have faded from my conscience since moving out of Ma n’ Pa’s. But it seems the days of simply having cousin Jake leaning agin' a fence post are long gone. Today’s modern high school boy must display his abs.

My parents are currently back in my father's hometown working on our family's genealogy and attending the best damn county fair in the nation. (116,563 in attendance so far, in just 3 days!) I hope my mom isn't too traumatized by all the shirtless high school seniors walking around.