Thursday, October 19, 2006

total domestic nonsensical rambling, nothing to see here

- It's a good thing we're leaving town, frankly, because i'm pretty convinced someone has it in for our wee pyggy family. My mini-pumpkins keep disappearing from the front porch, and although they are tiny and adorable and their orange paint is washing away (totally), I don't think the marauding ants (that have already eaten one of them) can carry even a mini-pumpkin off a full block down the street in less than an hour. Now, usually I'd blame the chipmunks here, but I see no toofmarks. Mockingbirds? Can they do that?

- Two, there have been tiny scattered piles of dog treats near our front door, which is nowhere near the sidewalk, so someone has been putting them there purposefully. Either that, or the dogwalker has a hole in his pants? They are not types we buy, and after BD injested one he was sick. Obviously, someone's trying to poison all of us.

-Three and unrelated, if anyone has opinions on wear to buy jeans, please let me know. "Four-sizes-too-big-but-a-total-steal from Loehmann's", "much-too-short-from-Target", "mens-from-thrift-store?-maybe", and "6-years-old-with-broken-zipper" are no longer working for me. I am in the market for something that makes my ass look fabulous and frankly, makes everyone in the room wonder why they did not try to make out with me when I was sixteen. THAT kind of jean. No, I am not willing to pay $300, because, just. No.

- Fourth and finally and completely unrelated to mini-pumpkins/poison/the fashion search above: I am also curious to see if anyone has anything appropriate for a superhero costume. Larges swatches of lycra? Danskin legwarmers? Sweatbands/wristands? More on this later.


Lauren said...


catherine said...

american apparel. i walked past their storefront this morning - they are totally playing up the superhero/costume thing. give it a shot. lots of spandex and leg warmers there.

The Governess said...

omg. of course. american apparel. that's such an easy solution for all my metallic boyshorts needs.

Kathryn Is So Over said...

For jeans - South Moon Under. Prices range from $100ish to $200ish but you can try on a whole bunch in one place. Guaranteed ass-tastic-ness.

Or, if you're cool with a pretty much guaranteed $150 purchase, just bite the bullet and go to Denim Bar at Pentagon City because they will just keep throwing good jeans at you until something sticks.

The Governess said...

thanks for the jeansassvice. i am willing to try south moon under, but i still feel the need to keep my purchase under the amount of my mortgage payment. i have a concert ticket habit to support. off to clarendon next week i skulk! maybe i'll even buy something. if i don't stop breathing before i get to the checkout counter. i am notoriously cheap.

i seriously need a stylist. can you hire a stacy-london-stupid-knockoff in this area for the afternoon, just to tell me if the jeans i try on make me lose ten pounds? I feel like somewhere out there, there is a pair of 70 dollar jeans that can do it. We just need to find each other. and be best friends. forever.

and sigh. i can't do denim bar. i really thought about it, but i just can't. i feel like i would be turning on myself or something, i can't explain it. it's heinously bitchy of me.

i have turned my nose up at the whole concept of that place in the past, (of course, without ever setting foot near it. i'm the ultimate in reverse snobbism.) i'm trying to break myself of it, becuse it's kind of deplorable, but i'm not ready to eat such a large plate of crow yet.

i know, i'm dumb. and rambly.

Adrienne said...

I wish I had jeans advice, because I've spent enough time and money trying to fin d the elusive Denim Love, but have failed. Miserably. Every time. I'm beginning to think that great jeans are only for tall and skinny girls, so I should stop trying.

Is it breaking the $100 barrier that makes a difference? Maybe I'll bite the bullet.

Brunch Bird said...

I walked into Denim Bar for the first time a couple weeks ago. It was a weekday afternoon, yet there were about eight employees leaning against the counter. When I walked in they greeted me with practiced ennui and I wheeled around and walked out. Please don't do it. You'll hate yourself later.

Heather said...

This is somewhere I never thought I'd buy jeans, but it's better than the mortgage-payment route. The Limited and Express started making those fantastically shaped slacks a few years back with cocky names (The Editor, The Drew), and they just started making them in jeans. I bought a pair of flared Drew pants and fucking adore them. Plus: $50. (Make-out-with-me ass? Check.) And when I was there you got $25 off the second pair. Now I sound like a goddamn commercial, and will stop.

The Governess said...

oh wait. i totally own editor pants from there. maybe i'll try it.

The Governess said...

DENIMUPDATE. Drew pants and Editor pants, although indeed cute, are for skinny girls. I would have had to wear a very large size indeed, which apparently the Limited doesn't like to keep on a hanger. And also, they were a little too short maybe?

I ended up at Banana Republic, which is where I buy a ton of pants anyways because they make pants for people with asses, and they more than a 1/2 zipper and were only 65 bucks or something. Which, if yr gonna have such a low rise, why bother with a zipper at all? I ASK YOU.

Also, why is Banana Republic now cheaper thatn J. Crew? Go straight to hell, J. Crew.