Wednesday, May 25, 2005

A Packetful of Splenda Makes the Camera Pill Go Down

The way I see it, a blog gives me the Michelle-Malkin-given right to demand that things be the way that I think they should be. Therefore, drug companies, I command you to stop making commercial with cartoonish versions of diseases, histamines and other maladies.

Worst offenders:

Allegra


I'll admit that lil' Pollen there does look itchy.

Lamisil

Since the side effect of the Lamisil is losing all your toenails, I'll go with unhealthy.

Mucinex


Mr. Mucus really crosses the line. Some sort of tasteless plaid-pants, suspendered, wife-beating loogey line.

Cartoons are too 1920-2002's. If these companies want to reach todays modern hypochondriac they need to get with the 28th century. People want amazing new technology, like camera pills. MTV, when this reality plastic surgery runs it course, may I suggest Celebrity Pill Camera. I bet you could hook one up to a Radio Shack 9 volt and steer it back and forth between Chad Michael Murray's intestines. The spin off will be called What Has The Ephemeral Hollywood Starlet Swallowed Now?

6 comments:

The Governess said...

while I'm all in nostalgic-school-flashback-mode, may i mention that Mr. Mucus looks like my junior high school principal.

K said...

Though not directly related, I gotta give a big "Boo!" to the depressed Paxil anthropomorphized pill thing.

Kriston said...

You mean that rock that those who are obviously too depressed/psychotic for their minds to function properly incorrectly refer to as an egg?

K said...

I swear to you it is an anthropomorphized man sized, mega-depressed pill. Probably sad because it has no legs. Or genitals.

The Deceiver said...

The worse thing about that Lamisil commersh is that the little toenail meanie demon like, lifts open the toenail like it was the trunk of a car! Sick! I was all: "Fuck! No cream is gonna stop that!"

the Nabob said...

While the Nabob is annoyed by the ones mentioned, including the wee sad blob, the most disappointing commercial is the Nasonex Bee. Not only has Antonio Banderas disgraced himself, but whomever turned that in as their freshman final project in Digital Animation 101 should get an F.