The Truth Is Not Out There

The following passage from Stephen Hayes’s book on Cheney is pretty much what you’d expect from a biography of the VP, with the ### standing in for just about any political group outside of the Douglas Feith Institute for Bespectacled Youth or its spin-off, the Heritage Foundation.

The ### community seized on Cheney’s allusion to classified information, and its hope turned to bitterness. “He was like the secretive and calculating Cheney of old.”

Pretty normal excerpt, right? Well, that’s where you’d be wrong, my friend, because the ### stands for UFO! And that makes it AWESOME!!1! According to the book, the Roswell folks were totally backing Cheney until 2004 when he told them to go DIAF.

IN YOUR FACE, ART BELL! IN YOUR FACE, ALEX KRYCEK! Cheney’s got no time for you and I Want To Believe belly aching! Get back into the basement.