Posting IM conversations is for lazy people.
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TR: i require assistance.
me: Timz. what is new, my homes? i want to come to chicago.
TR: come come...
me: i CANT. I AM BROKE. BECAUSE PEOPLE KEEP GETTING MARRIED FAR AWAY.
TR: should I go to Alaska this weekend or Frankfurt Germany*?
me: both are so different
TR: It's a tough call... here are some facts...
me: okay, hit me
TR: I have never been to Alaska, I have been to Germany. I will be solo. Getting to Germany will be easier than Alaska and more luxurious. Neither will cost any more. I love Northern Exposure.
me: Alaska has a lot of dudes, and might be cold. BUT. it has glaciers! and moose. meese? mooses.
TR: I love Nena's 99 luftballoons.
me: GERMANY has GERMANS. which is a big plus. OH OH what if you ran into Germans in Alaska?
TR: And if I go to Germany (this is the crazy part)...
me: Germans LOOOOVE Alaska, btw
TR:I can fly back through Dulles on Sunday, pop up to Prov., have easter dinner with the family and jet back to Chicago on Mon morning... which is the craziest jet setting, ever.
me: wow. you are my hero
TR: It's something else, isn't it? WAIT... Alaska has FJORDS to see, though.
TR: And I can say I've been to Alaska when it's all said and done.
me: yes. you can do that. well, you could do that anyways, you'd just be a liar
TR: Fine, then I'm Chinese American.
me: again with the lies
TR: So what should I do? Tough choices, all around.
me: Wait... sorry. I got distracted by a phone call from my bank.
TR: That's okay, take your time, write it out if necessary.
me: apparently i deposited my paycheck this morning and uh. MY BOSS DIDNT SIGN IT. ooookay. right. where were we? Ah, Germany vs. Alaska
TR: Wait you get paychecks and not direct deposit?
me: I work for a 3-person office now. Everything is done manually. A mule-and-oxen team powers the AC
TR: Great! Does that mean you can't call out sick?
me: I can call out sick. I think my coworker calls in apathetic and probably sometimes drunk.
TR: Beautiful. "I can't come in today, I'm lonely"
me: we're going to Vegas for work for a full week, and all he can talk about is drinking. So, naturally, I love my new job. I have Urban Dance Squad's "Deeper Shade of Soul" playing over the intercom right now. If that doesn't get me fired, then I'm at a loss.
* similar conversations often occur when yr pals work for major airlines. Someone at Fox had written an entire sitcom about TR's life called "The Loop." Just as we were contemplating ways to sue, TR's life was cancelled. Harsh. ALSO, TR and I used to be obsessed with the fact that BMWs had air conditioned glove compartments because German's didn't want their chocolate bars to melt. Ture or false? Fuck it, I don't really care either way, I just love the thought of it.
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One of these days, we will outgrow our house, and therefore outgrow our neighborhood, and I will be so sad to leave. You really have no idea.
This morning before work, I ran errands. I got my emissions test done, 2 weeks late. I went to the post office.
At the post office, the guy who always works the desk in the mornings, Fraser, was jumping rope out on the sidewalk. Apparently, he does this every morning, in full regulation USPS uniform.