Wednesday, February 13, 2008

They also mentioned something about Tom having to get off his ass and do the Morning Roundup

After an icy, swerving and 4-times-as-long commute home last night and before the animal and I both bit it on the same storm grate simultaneously in a manner that would make Robert Gates proud, the Pyggy household was blessed to receive a personal phone call from a certain Senator running for President. Usually, these messages are mass deleted with the other 10 or so we get for the people who used to have our number and seemingly owe millions of dollars to various loan sharks.

But this message stood out because it was clearly recorded yesterday afternoon, with reference to things that we happening right then. It basically sounded like this:
Hello friend. I know the weather is terrible out there in Northern Virginia and car accidents have blocked every ramp and bridge out town. But toady is Election Day and you and I both now that this campaign may be the most important EVAR. Also, I want to be President so bad. I am not all those things that my opponents say that I am. In fact I am for the same things that you are for. Like more money in your pocket and that one dog you like at the dog show. Probably the beagle. And I’m against terrorists. Because, god forbid, if there is ever an attack in DC, today’s weather has pretty much proven that an evacuation of the city is fracking impossible. The radio said some people hadn’t moved on 395 for 4 hours. Four hours! Dirty bomb clouds move pretty fast folks, hope you can hold your breath for four hours. Anyway, if you can, walk on down to your polling site and vote for me.

I may have taken some liberties with the middle of the message. But the beginning bit about the bad weather and the back end about terrorists were almost verbatim.

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