Friday, August 08, 2008

Carlos the Dwarf: The Movie

The plan is too see Pineapple Express tonight.

With the exception of September’s Coen Brothers pic, it looks like the next few weeks are going to be pretty barren at the old multiplex. That’s why the Pineapple Express better be the best fucking movie I’ve ever seen with my 127-year-old cataract-filled mole eyes.

This will most likely be the last movie the Pyggies will see in a theater for at least 5 years. When we make it back, it’ll be for some delightful animated romp that a Pixar executive just thought up yesterday. Children will love it for the bright colors and silly voices. Adults will barely tolerate the thinly veiled jokes about President Tim Pawlenty. I’ll abide the recycled Star Wars sound effects slipped in by animation nerds.

And it’ll be a matinee.

Or maybe I’ll sneak out by myself and watch a midnight showing of The Dark Knight Returns after everyone else has gone to bed.

Either way, I’ve ruined my life.

Come on Pineapple Express. Make the next 18 years worth while.

No comments: