i was seeing double for 3 straight days/after i got born again it felt really strange

GLORY GLORY STARS N STRIPES N ALL THAT

Tonight, we see Patton Oswalt. Then, Pygs Incorporated are travelling southwards, to spend some QT with Old Pals for the weekend. Old Pals have a scruffy dog, two cats that make me sneeze, and habitate near both a river capable of floating my sweet ass on a tube AND a field of goats, one of whom has a bladder condition. Also, one half of this magical couple is making tomato salad, and I'm planning on getting housed Saturday night with any random, 19-year-old summer session students I can find on the streets. Also, I might jump in a quarry. Also also, I might duct-tape sparklers to my hands on Monday. Edward Sparkler Hands.

HOUSECLEANING, FRIDAY INTERNETS GIFTS

Wherein the Governess turns her head on luddite ways, and embraces her inner Kottke. Instead of working, here's what I've been doing. In summary, shouldn't you be paying me for this already?

http://www.fontshop.com/iam/
Long ago and far away I wrangled a degree in graphic design, and promptly proceeded to mistreat the document and what it represented to unimaginable heights. Therefore, I am not in the business of design any longer. I did, however, retain a few things from that educational experience, one being an A in Typography, (AN A. no shitting) which led to an overwhelmingly dull obsession with fonts and font history. I can't tell you anything else about design or art, and I suck at making your start-up company a logo so please, don't ask, it will be really bad. But I will tell every bored human within ten feet of me about the kerning problems on the signs of the restaurant where we just ate lunch. Also, I am still kind of upset over typographi.ca having to switch to typographi.com. I am the Governess' smirking revenge. On comic sans.

http://www.learningtoloveyoumore.com/hello/index.php
There's got to be something even someone as ADD as myself can complete here.

http://www.wickerpedia.org/wiki/Main_Page/
Ha.

http://www.kodomo.go.jp/gallery/digi/KODOMO_WEB/index_e.html For a short while, Kodomo No Kuni was my everything. My Friendster and Myspace icons, my reason for breathing, whatever. I finally admitted I will not be able to own any copies of these, because I'm sure the only prints that exist are tucked away in Japan's national archives or something.

http://emilie.halgatewood.com/yawn.html
Don't yawn.

http://3hive.com/
Do you like ethereal music? Because i feel like that's the only thing I find up here, most of the time. Although I am very, very compelled to pick up Bear vs. Shark

http://www.adequacy.net/int/tm/index.shtml
Because "Two Front Teeth" was about 9/11. Uh. Okay. Well, at least now you all know.

http://www.gawker.com/news/media/new-york-times/index.php#you-get-what-you-give-110744
You only get what you give, you know.

JESUS

Okay, have a nice weekend. Sorry I missed Unbuckled last night, everyone who has a blog in DC, but I have volleyball on Thursdays and my team is lost without me. I simply own the game. Right. Anyways, regarding (again) this weekend. My mother has already called twice to remind me not to drink and drive, or do any hard drugs like heroin. I might be 176 years old, but she still has this inner need to be Boss. So if you kittens out there in internets land don't have moms who consider themselves walking, talking, 1980's PSAs, please just email me your phone number. I can guarantee you my mom will give you a call, too, if you so wish. She loves you, you know.