A really futile and stupid gesture...

So I may be going away for a while. Too busy to post at day, too tired to post nights. Blog it was good to know you. But before I go, world, I give you this gift. It will no doubt dramatically alter the way people discover this site.

Plus, my computer's busted so this thing needs a place to live.

According to some fancy software I have, it will take almost ten minutes to read this list out loud. Be careful not to leave it up long if you're at work, you don't want anyone questioning your manhood. It's probably NSFW in general. A first for this site.

It's been several years in the making. I didn't ask for them, they just started showing up one day. At first it was easy, just cut and paste. Then the filters started to clamp down and it became harder to decipher the messages. Finally I just gave up. But I've had them ever since. And now, so do you.


Are you ready?

I'm ready.

Gag Her With Your Voluminous Cock Size
Smack Her Snatch With Your Mammoth Johnson
Make Her Swallow While She's On Top Of Your Tree Stump
a small dick is not forever
Lengthen your private parts safely and naturally
Make Her Suffocate On Your Fat Johnson
She Will Beg For More After She Gets A Piece Of Your New Sex Pistol
Shatter Her Vagina With Your Monster Prick
Stupid naked orgy
Get your cock huge
My Wife Says, Now You've Got The Perfect Fit
break walls apart with your huge cock
Increase The Size Of Your Tool Without Danger
Get Her Excited With Your Massive Size Rod
Have Her Begging For More With Your New Monster Prick
Choke Her With Your Brimming Sized Knob
Make That Slut Suck On Your Brimming Sized Knob
why go through life with a tiny dick?
Simply, a humunggoous willy
Make Her Wish Your Were Smaller After She Sees What You Got
Impress Your Girl With Your New Massive Package
Transform your rod into a monster
Grow a dick bigger than Shaqs
Save the RAINFORESTS with your ENORMOUS "FIRE HOSE
USE YOUR DICK TO HIT PEOPLE!!!
wow her with your bigger dong -
ENLARGO - Vasodilator Penile Enlargement!
Imagine Your Women Climbing On Your New Whopper Tree Stump
Work Her Out With Your Whopping Knob
how to have a 12" pipe
Women, Imagine Your Man Having A Humungous Crank
Want Her Sucking And Riding Your New Huge Jumbo Rod?
Increase your size and length
Want a king-size PENIS in one week?
look like a freak in your shorts
Reach Her Clit By Shoving Your Dip Stick Down Her Throat
Reach That G Spot, Make Her Beg For More
Tear Buildings Down With Your Heavyweight Humungous Walloping Knob
sucker down and they will freak
Grow your Manhood
Keep It Going For Days With Your Thundering Rod
A bigger wang - Could you use a garganntuan member?
looking for a bigger bang in your pants?
bigger stick?
Wouldnt you like if yours was a bit longer and fuller
Increase your penis 3 inches in 22 days
don't have a small willy
She will gasp when she sees it
Give your girlfriend what she wants
Men, Expand, Lengthen and Enlarge yourself safely and naturally
Become the man of steel in your pants
Ever think there was a way to gain more size ?
Pull out your Horse Cock, then see the look on her face!
So you dont believe that you can get another 3 in ches out of yours?
You can't workout THIS muscle at the gym.....
MAKE YOUR SEX BIGGER...Make..Her Moan..for It!..
penises 'r' us....Technology enables our scientists to present the world's most effective formula for 2.5 inches
Its been proven to fill it out and make it longer!
make her moan with a large penis
get bigger for the bedroom without any hassle!
do you want a jumbo penis?
have a huge wanker
Penis enlargement hits Canada
Lengthen your Male Anatomy safely and natural...
Do all you can to make that tool bigger
she wants all you can give her
do you want her to respect you in the morning?
Men, Expand, Lengthen and Enlarge yourself safely and naturally
king daddy penis
give a boost to your manhood
Ever wonder why ugly men can have a good looking gal? They have gigantic cocks!
We guarantee to make yours larger or its free
Get the confidence by gaining some beef
so you want a huge dick?
Want a colossal clock
Make her your most erotic dream come true.
Josh, Want it bigger? Much Bigger?
Lengthen your Male Anatomy safely and natural...
can you keep her happy in bed?
rock hard penis
beeeg dick
How much more do you need?
Get the girl you want - get your prick up to par
big dicks for u
Drive her wild just like old times - Be the man of steel IN YOUR PANTS!!!
dick size for you
Modern technology at it's best! - This is The #_1 Manhood Enlargement Pill Available On The Market Today.
Summer flings and good times are waiting to happen with your new manhood
Dont feel bad about your privates any more
The girls like em thick
your pants no longer fit because of your huge new cock
The real way to a larger you
Would you like a larger one...? or for your spouse to have a larger one.
offering massive results within weeks - this product can enlarge Your manly unit 3+ inches
She respects size
she said you need a bigger penis
beefier penis
pump up your thing
dreaming about a bigger willie?
equipment for the bedroom
So Large it does its own talking, ho
Every man wishes he was bigger
no one here wants this...your manhood is too small
.S.u.p.e.r. .S.i.z.e. .Y.o.u.r.s.e.l.f.
3 Inches and Lasting Results
Make em all jealous by how big you look
Do the honeys call you dinky?
do the honeys call you shrinky dink?
Shipped Discretely To Your Front Door, Get IT . . . At Discount Prices Add 3 inches!
Don't get caught with your pants down and a small member!
want to learn how to look like a penis god, with no effort?
Penis enlargement with no vacuum pump
a little something extra for your lovelife
fatten your member
big surprise for your wife
Shock her with the improved YOU
jump start your love life with three new inches
your thingy shrunk?
Make then freak when they see it!
oh my, you'll have what it takes with this!
in the end, its all about the size of it
i'd be surprised if this didn't help the little man in your pants
take a substantial leap in length
Pills for your penis
why not have the length and width u want
dodge those sticky bedroom problems3
okay ladies now you can get massive mamory glands
ratchet up your manly member
whoppersized manhood
You don't have to be shy when its big
Hey tiny, fattten that schlong!
bring your johnson up to the next level
get the lead out of yourpecker
feeling too small in your bed?
massive penile growth
no more skeeter peter
add size to your lovestick
create size for your lovemachine
make her orgasmic with your new 12 incher
PVBig Bat in the trouserswaa
Plumpen your pumper
get in deeper with a Huge trouusserr-snake
wow em with your size
she said you were shit in bed1
make the wife smile ALL day long
Take Your New 7+ Inch Tool And Make Her Choke
three inches longer and 30% wider guaranteed
i heard that you can add mass to your crank
nature's way to give you enhanced manhood
actual before and after enlargement pics
women just couldn't take their eyes off the bulge
They will accuse you of having a bat down your slacks
make your mark under the sheets
Blast thru pants in record time
hard to believe but you can make her happy with this
someone made a product to help you please the ladies
go from pinsized to huge
Your huge new dick will make you the life of the party
puberty is not the only time you can get massive new organ
Take Your New 7+ Inch Tool And Make Her Choke
She'll Beg For You To Stop After You Show Her Your New Joystick
Take Your New 7+ Inch Tool And Make Her Choke
Prove to your woman that you can knock boots with the best of em
make her feel the wrath of the animal inside you
seriously, why stay small?
Hey, You can gain two or three inches guaranteed
Open your pants and let the MONSTER OUT!
Strech Her Cum Dumpster Apart
Spreadin Lips as far apart as possible
Rip Her Cockpit Apart
Men are clapping, unzip and find out why?
monsterdick
Hammer Her Crank Case
engorge your manhood
Be a battleship around a bunch of sailboats
Split Her Pussy Pot Pie Apart
let the length of it show thru your shorts
Rip Her Hot Pocket Apart
Rip Her Bloomin' Onion Apart
Pound Her Penis Slide
Your mate wont be able to handle you now
Ever been hunted because of your smell?
Pound On Her Semen Locker
1-4 extra inches makes a massive difference
Be that freight train in the Love Zone
Do U Want a FootLong C0CK ?
FatWang@14innches.com
N0 More Being Shy About Your Manhood
get a couple of extra inches
When you're this big, they call you Mister
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Grow a New Pussy Ripping Whale DlCK
No reason to be 5 or 6 inches when you can be 8 or 9!
Put some Girth on theTallywacker
Advantage = Penetrate.deeper and Make.love Better.
BLOW YOUR BALLS APART!
Put a Tornado Under the Hood
There Are NO Agonizing Hanging Weights
Does your Girlfriend say wow when you Drop your Pants? Mine does.
GIRTH PLEASE HER LIKE NEVER BEFORE
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MEATIER and MANLIER
Drop the HAMMER on the next chick you bang...
More zing for your zinger
WISH YOU COULD FILL HER UP?
from pencil size to baseball bat
make her holler your name all night
hey little man, You can have a thicker package.
Puff it up! Be large quickly with our help.
Gain size and stamina where it counts.
Mr. Big - Growth products for the boys!
Boomin' Banana - Girthy Woody
Dr. Willy Strecher's Growth plan
Dr Schlong's Ultmate confidence booster for guys
Mr. Luv Tool Make Her Want It
DR. BIG peter SuRPRISe HER
Mr.BANANA - BE THE BIGGERMAN
4 Any Male CHANGE NIGHT YOUR TOOL!
Cock Enhancer 1-3 inches Money Back Guarantee!
Dr.LargeStick - make it huge, guys



There you have it. The titles to every penis spam I received for a 6 month period. Use it carefully.


Thanks, Tom

Good lord, no more.